Gutted

[JSJ]

I've just got off the phone from my mum and she has informed me that the cancer drug trial that my father has been accepted for may involve someone within the group receiving a placebo treatment. I know I must sound naive.. maybe even gulliable to have not thought that far into the situation, as I know it only makes sense for a scientific trial to have a control and a placebo to compare results to. But it just doesn't seem ethically right. My father is devastated as this fact was not made clear to him by his doctor.. it was brought to his attention by a nurse in the chemo ward. He has been told that the chemo he is receiving now will not cure him.. it will not acheive remission.. this trial drug was his last cling to hope. I'm gutted.. I don't even know what else to think or say about it. I'm so angry now that I don't know whether I can be bothered to host my biggest morning tea.. what's the point donating to a cause that plays god to those who are suffering and clinging to a false hope. I really want to say they can go jam themselves real good.

[BrumbyJack]

Just hope your father gets the real thing...

But then again, considering it is a trial, who know he may be better off with the placebo.

You've already said it, there has to be proper scientific testing, which means double blind trials.

Remember if it's at the testing stage, it isn't approved for use yet, so anything is a bonus.

Yes, I've been there, I lost my Mother to cancer in 2005.

[Wolverine]

Sorry to hear that JSJ.
Think of it this way perhaps....you support the overall cause in finding cures for cancer by supporting an overall struggle for both the patient and their families?
I know it may be hard to fathom but every little bit everyone does in forward progression to finding cures for diseases, is just that, a forward progression.

[karen97]

Sorry to hear JSJ :(

[Polaris]

cancer affected everyone involved JSJ not just the sufferer
Even though it is hurting you bad atm, try and look at the big picture and you will see the medical people are trying to help everyone and be assured they are helping you Dad the best they can

[24]

hey JSJ, ethically they must compare the pottential new treatment to whatever the standard best treatment already accepted as being effective and in use is. they don't give your father nothing, unless there is currently no treatment in existence that acheives any results.

i don't know the details, but from an ethics committee point of view, they must be comparing it to what the current best treatment is, to measure whether it is better than that.

[24]

also, those things aside, it really ****s that your dad has cancer. :(

I don't believe this is the way the world is supposed to be, there is nothing 'right' about that sort of suffering.

[ 18. May 2009, 10:32 PM: Message edited by: 24 ]

[Podlettte]

Very hard for you and your family and so horrible for your dad JSJ. :(

Mum's brother, mum and sister died from various forms of cancer, and her brother participated in a trial for throat cancer as there was nothing that could have been done for him, chemo wasn't working and the trial was trying to treat aggressive throat + mouth cancer. It was his wish to try to help other sufferers by being part of the trial.

If your dad chooses to participate he will be doing very worthwhile work for everyone. I know it's hard, no impossible to think like that right now though.

*hugs*ooooooooo

[Legolas]

your poor dad, mum and family :(

I hope your dad doesn't give up on the life he has and the opportunity to embrace it for as long as possible, and to never stop leaving gifts behind for his family and future sufferers to benefit from.

There are just no "chin up" pearls of wisdom to offer for the many many people who go through this every year...so many people suffering alone and so many more to come until we find a cure :(

[Barcoo]

My mum had cancer JSJ, hugs from me too.

[Xena]

That's so sad, I am sorry JSJ.

http://smileys.on-my-web.com/repository/Sad/sad-023.gif

[Jahoota]

:(

[JSJ]

Thanks for the thoughts and kind words. I just can not get past the anger at the moment. I know that my father's participation in this trial supports the search for a cure or more efficient treatment, yet however selfish it may sound at the moment, I just want my dad better. I guess living some distance away I can pretend sometimes that all is ok.. but it's not.. and I feel as though reality has punched me in the stomach really hard. I want someone or something to blame.. but there isn't anyone or anything to blame.

[bdenny4]

I know how you feel and everything you are saying is exactly how I felt at the time with my Mum.
Luckily hers was a happy ending.

thoughts are with you

[SDJ]

I posted this in the "sad day" thread but not sure if u noticed it JSJ. But my thoughts are with you

I recently went through the cancer winning the fight against my mum only a few weeks ago it isnt easy at all and no words anyone says can really make it any easier. The way im able to deal with it is knowing that she no longer has to deal with the pain and sufffering of such a vicious disease. The only thing I can suggest is make the most of the time you have with them while u can cause some people arent as fortunate and loose there loved ones in a freak accident and dont get the chance to tell them how much they love them and actually be able to say good bye...

On that note Im sorry to hear about your father and I hope that by some miracle he is able to pull through it

[ozgirl]

That is very sad - but just think by participanting in the trial he still has more hope. How many are participating in the trial? What are the odds of him getting the new treatment? It is higher than if he wasn't participating at all. Some hope is better than none.

But I am sure it makes you feel better to vent so go ahead... I know I would

[platinumbunny]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Cancer is such a rotten disease. It can destroy all it touches. I recently lost someone to cancer, and can tell you that I would have felt exactly as you do if he had been placed in a trial and then discovered he has a 50/50 chance of placebo.

I hope that your father can beat this with all my heart. Sending you positive vibes.

[Snowbunny83]

So sorry to hear your sad news JSJ. My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. :(

[BrumbyJack]

It's OK to feel angry... just let it all out.

It's OK to feel confused too.

This is a pretty good place to rant and let it all out smile.gif

I will never forget the moment I realised I was trying to keep my Mother conscious... for Who's benefit??? Mine, not hers. That hurt, I felt so selfish, but it's a normal thing to want to do.

I hope your Mum is OK and that your family can all help each other out and support each other.

Of course I hope it all works out with the best possible outcome for your Dad.

[TC]

im so sorry and i hope it all works out for your Dad.

[Spiceman]

:( :(